surprises

This is undoubtedly God's blessing and His work, not necessarily identified by the difficulties and the way it isn't exactly "easy" but instead, by my giggle ---basically I smile like a fool in the midst of hardship, because of His presence.

I watch myself trusting His plan because I have learned intimately how my plans brought death and despair. 

There is joy where I now experience lack, because I remember how the bounty nearly broke me.

His ways are not my ways. Why am I always so surprised?

Tests

Early this week I had a big accounting test, and life of course, is a test.  Last time I had an accounting test I studied like crazy...and got a sty in my eye. This time a new sty appeared and I had an ongoing headache and anxiety.  
I found out that I got a 96% and instead of relief, I just felt like crying...

Funny how the verse I read that morning was Jesus' words:

Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.

I have so much to learn.

I am dust.

"The LORD is merciful and gracious, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love. He will not always chide, nor will he keep his anger forever. He does not deal with us according to our sins, nor repay us according to our iniquities. For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his steadfast love toward those who fear him; as far as the east is from the west, so far does he remove our transgressions from us. As a father shows compassion to his children, so the LORD shows compassion to those who fear him. For he knows our frame; he remembers that we are dust."
Life sure has a way of knocking us down. I feel like curling up in my bed and discontinuing what life calls me to be and do. I am thankful for God's promise of compassion at time's like this.